What do we mean by Fathering? by Mark Lowe

There is some misunderstanding over spiritual parenting in the church today, which reminds me of how the Pharisees were with Jesus when He would not affirm their wrong view of God. Many moves of God around the world are kicked off by young people. They need parenting and help if they are not going to crash but the cries for this around the church and on the Internet make my skin crawl.

• He’s/she’s too young
• Not trained
• Who is holding him/her to account? -telling him off
• Things happening that we don’t agree with
• There’s no order!
• Who do they think they are?
• They don’t meet our idea of what a leader should be

All the kind of stuff that was slung at Jesus!

As a parent I sometimes embarrass my children but generally being a musician puts me in the cool bracket. There is not much they can say or do that would embarrass us, they regard us as the wayward ones, me with my earring, Karen with seven earrings, we both still look a bit hippyish. When I was growing up I had long hair was into rock music and in those days it brought a degree of shame on my parents when we went to church. But I can remember my mum standing up to people, she would not let anyone criticize me or my music, she stood with me- she was my mum! I could have turned up with a Mohican hair cut she would have still stood with me.

There is a worrying idea about parenting and holding ministries accountable which is misrepresenting God. That somehow we should be putting people right, picking them up on everything they say and do and how they look and behave, that they are fair game for any self appointed "gardian of the faith" to publish a view- a kind of "Spiritualized Paparazzi".  I just don’t think it’s the Jesus way. 

The Gospel of faith has been turned into the Gospel of getting everything right. As far as I am concerned being right is over rated- not a very attractive trait! We are saved by faith yet we are then told that the gospel is communicated by getting everything right- excellence is the power, adhering to conservative spiritual preferences is what counts. Since when did we have to earn salvation for others? It is by faith that the Gospel Message of power is communicated.

Both Karen and I have always tried to stand with those who are going for it rather than those would want to control those who are. Often the accusers were once radicals and forerunners themselves. We have known what it is to have complaints aimed our way, to be shamed and humiliated and even not appreciated as Spiritual parents but together we stand with them, this is what parenting is about. No glamour there, often just mess to be cleared up!

I love the way that Jesus handled the accusers of the Prostitute, in modern terms you could imagine him saying- those who have never looked at a women, glanced at porn on the internet, lusted after your friends wife, ministered with mixed motives etc. -cast the first stone!

We then get a revelation of how we should be, Jesus left alone with the prostitute (alone!- not good in any culture) somehow manages to meet her where she is with grace, kindness and mercy yet still maintains the standard- go and sin no more. Could it be that we so easily lapse into seeing the "standard" as the tool for salvation from sin rather than being Jesus to people- God with skin on?

Mark Lowe

Comments

[anon]

nice one